With much string-pulling from my accountant, bank manager, lawyer and his lovely PA, I have managed to successfully exit my marriage and buy a house! A house that’s mine alone. Well, it’s 20% mine, 80% the banks, but close enough. The point is, the bank doesn’t care if I leave pots soaking in the kitchen sink, or if I do a 1000 piece puzzle on the dining table. MINE, MINE, MINE, MINE, MINE.
In two weeks, I get to start moving in. Now I’ve just got to work out how to pay the bills. Ex thinks I’ve got my head in the clouds for believing that I can get away with part-time work. But I think it’s the right thing to do. He thinks I won’t earn enough for the kids. I think they need quality time more than they need luxuries. I have become accustomed to second guessing my decisions when he doubts me, and I usually just end up doing things his way to avoid an argument. Sticking to my decisions is new for me, but I’m fairly confident I can make it work. Maybe I’m wrong, but I’m willing to try, even if that means failure.
I suspect the main reason it bothers him so much is because he doesn’t like the idea of having to pay me maintenance when I’m not “pulling my weight”. But believe me, I’ll be pulling my weight. I’ll be working hard at making ends meet, and ensuring that our children grow up in a stable, secure environment, where Mum is there to help with homework, talk about problems, and celebrate successes. I’ll be there to supplement the learning of our ADHD/Aspie daughter, who struggles to focus in a classroom. I’ll be pulling my weight by hugging out the bad days and wiping away the tears. I’ll be there to ensure that discipline is being enforced in a way that is constructive and helps to mold them in to ethical, caring and confident adults. I’m sure that day-care and after school programmes are excellent; I intend to use them during school holidays. But nothing can replace having a devoted parent home after school, and I would be doing our children a disservice if I didn’t try.
I have a trial run gardening work day on Monday and I start my 4-hour-a-week job on Tuesday. Also my flyers for my pet-sitting/cleaning show up this week. I’ve heard murmurs of interest for my oven cleaning services, so you never know, it might just pan out. Or I might have my head in the clouds. We’ll have to wait and see.