Bad Genes

I once read that people are more attracted to people that look like themselves. As a results of this, folks who are adopted have an increased risk of accidentally falling in love with someone who is related to them by blood. In fact, there has been occurrences in which couples have found out that they were as closely related as brother and sister. I don’t think this will ever be a problem for me. Because today I was looking at photographs of my ancestors and they were horrifying. I apologise to anyone in my family that may take offense to this, but holy shit, have you SEEN what great great grandad and co. looked like? We have some seriously questionable genetics going on here!

Great, great, great, great grandad John. What a catch!

Great, great, great, great grandad Johan. What a catch!

While I’m on the subject of old photographs, I’m wondering why they all had to look so miserable? You know the pictures I mean – a family all dressed up in their Sunday best, standing around looking like someone just shot their beloved dog. Maybe smiling just wasn’t cool back then, kind of like how emo kids don’t like smiling today. It must have been quite a feat, to get all of the children, even the smallest of the lot, to look completely brain dead for one photo.

It takes special skill to raise children to be unfeeling cyborgs.

It takes special skill to raise children to be joyless cyborgs.

I have to use the burst setting on my camera to even have a small chance of getting a photo of my children looking somewhat normal. If I want a photo of both of them together, I pretty much have to accept, that someone is either going to be pulling a face, or looking like they have a congenital disorder. Looking at the lineage, perhaps they do.

She may be a rich little brat, but even she knows that giant rocking horse is a bit fucking excessive.

She may be a rich little brat, but even she knows that giant rocking horse is a bit fucking excessive.

P.S. Please email in pictures of your most awful old family photos, I’ll post them on here so we can all laugh at dead people together Send to jsangster34@gmail.com, subject: BAD GENES.

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